My sincerest apologies to my readers (yes, all 3 of you) for not posting for a long time. I know this blog is the reason some of you wake up in the morning, and however strongly I may feel that there are probably better reasons for living, I do feel bad about making you endure the absence of new material. (I mean, just look at all the pretty colors on this site…how could I blame you?)

I’ve honestly been incredibly busy lately, however, as the title of this post suggests, more content is coming soon. And I mean soon. Possibly very soon. For that reason, I recommend you check back, well, soon.

Until then, here is something to educate you on the delicate nuances of Japanese culture.

One of the things I get asked a lot is, “Why Japanese?” After all, the language is somewhat off the beaten path of Spanish and French (at least in most American schools), so it seems like a fairly standard question to get as a white guy that speaks (read: cannot at all speak) Japanese. The problem is, I don’t really have a good answer for it. I mean, that’s not to say that I don’t have a reason for learning Japanese, it’s just that I find my reasons aren’t particularly interesting, and people usually seem pretty let down after they hear them. It’s as if people hold me to some higher standard of interestingness as soon as they hear the word “Japanese.” Honestly I think people would be less surprised to meet a guy with three arms than they are when they find out I speak Japanese.

Before I digress too much, my reasons for taking up Japanese. Honestly, it was not much more than a random choice. I went to college thinking I wanted to be an International Relations major, which required “proficiency in a foreign language.” Since the only previous language experience I had had was Latin, which rivals Chia Pets in terms of actual real-world utility, I needed to start from scratch. (And, by the way, don’t believe a word of what you hear about Latin helping you on the SAT; I made the surprising finding that, contrary to all logical thinking, the best way to prepare for a test of English verbal skills is to (brace yourself for this one) study actual English.) So when it came time to pick classes for my first semester of college, I sat down and thought long and hard about what language to take. I took three main points into consideration, namely:

1. I know people that live in Japan.

2. I do not have any friends in any other countries.

3. I really had to pee.

After some hemming and hawing that lasted nearly .06 seconds, I signed up for introductory Japanese. I then promptly went to the bathroom. There honestly was not much more to it than that. People are usually pretty disappointed with this answer, which baffled me at first. I quickly learned, however, that it had little to do with my reasons. You see, I like to think of myself as a pretty normal dude. There isn’t anything too crazy about me; I’m just an average guy. After being in Japanese class for some time I realized that that was exactly the problem. I was normal. The reason I got strange responses after telling people why I slave over learning Japanese is because the average person that takes Japanese (well, at least the average white person- more on this another time) is, to put it nicely, weird. The more Japanese classes I’ve been in, the more I’ve come to realize this. Since I neither (a) watch anime for 6793 hours each day (in fact *gasp* I don’t even like anime.), nor (b) have a creepy obsessive fetish for Japanese women, I don’t fit the paradigm of your average student of Japanese. People can’t seem to comprehend this. Why would anyone want to learn Japanese unless it was to be able to watch strange cartoons in their original language, or to satiate a burning Yellow Fever? Like I said before, I don’t really know the answer myself, but I’m working on it. Before I get to that, though, I really have to pee.

First of all, welcome to IThinkImTurningJapanese.net! I’m an American living abroad in the playground country that is Japan. Seeing as how there are online communities of people devoted to nearly anything you can imagine, I figured there must be at least a few people out there that might be interested in reading stories about the things that happen to me here. Honestly, this site isn’t really intended for anything outside of my own personal satisfaction, so I can’t make any promises. However, if you’re looking for mature and reasoned insights into things like Japanese politics or societal issues, you should probably leave this site ASAP. I’m also making no claims as to this site being more interesting than chewing ice, so stay tuned at your own risk.